Originally Posted by trailmix

Hi mamabear,

I'm can see this thread is a bit upsetting for you perhaps and i'm sorry about that. I think, for me, being protective of you is more important than the other person in your life and that does need to be taken in to consideration. In no way is this personal about him though, none of us know him and only know the small portion of your story that you have shared.

As for her cheating, absolutely, it's wrong, she did it, in no way is he to "blame" for that, that's clear.

What if he was posting here and told you that little bit of his story, what would your reply be?

Maybe something like, why did you choose her, have you thought about that?

Now, that's said often here, focus back on yourself, why would you settle for a relationship that is less that you need/want/deserve. Whether that is with an emotionally distant or abusive addict or a partner that cheats.

In no way is that a negative reflection on the person per-se, in my opinion, but worth asking so that the same patterns don't follow?

I don't understand the part about why she cheated when she was the one with fertility issues, it makes zero sense, however, as I said, we only know a tiny bit of this story, she may have a whole lot of issues (attempted suicide) but that's not clear from what you posted.

I don't know, I'm no expert, I just hope you know that no one is attacking you (or him), in my view and I really hope he turns out to be a great guy and makes you happy!