Why ? Well there's a question. A great question to distract you from focussing on what will really help you to get sober and recover. Acceptance can be as simple as "I understand that I can't just stop. I need to get some help, change my thinking and my reactions, and I need to work on my recovery if I'm going to stay sober and learn to be happy that way."
Is there anything stopping you getting to that Monday AA meeting you mentioned trying?
BB