Cosima, btw I don't mean to minimize ANY of your struggles by suggesting that they are "normal." For what it's worth, it doesn't sound to me like you don't have a career or a family--rather, it sounds like you are in the process of finding both. There is no way to get to either without a bit of trial and error. You might do real estate or you might rule it out as a viable and satisfying profession. You might make a go of it with the guy or you will rule him out and move on! No way forward but through, as they say!