I feel for you Red, but that post was all:
I guess
I think
I hope
I want
To me those are words I've used before. Before I was ready to really stop drinking.
All it takes is never drinking again.
You are posting here because that's what you want. I know I did, way back in 2013. It took me this long to give it to myself.
Hope you get it done sooner than I did.