196 days.....
Hello,
I am here today because I want to stay connected with people trying to stay sober. I found this site back in 2013.
I believe that those of us who have admitted they are alcoholics have the same story so I will spare you the drunk log.
But suffice it to say that my alcoholism took many things away from me, my marriage included.
Today I sit here with 196 days, thats 6 months and 2 weeks according to my phone app.
My last drunk was in October 2017. At which point I was penniless and couldn't find my vehicle. I was 3 hrs drive away from my brothers house where I was living, I didn't get that vehicle back for a month and a half. Thats a story for another time.
I had been arrested for public intoxication. Spent one night in jail and was released the next morning. I had no other options except to call a AA friend and he drove 6 hrs round trip to get me.
I decided to give that prayer and higher power of my understanding thing a try, I mean what did I have to lose!?
I started simple asking only for the strength to stay sober that minute, that hour, that 24 hrs. I ended up running into a childhood friend at a AA meeting. He gave me some work hanging gutters on houses. Not great pay but it was something..... we talked a lot about our addiction. I now believe it was one of those Creator things, we were put back into each others lives when we needed each other most.
He helped me go back and get my vehicle.... I had no idea where l left it. I had to do dectective work to figure it out. Im sure some can relate.
As I continued to pray and get back in touch with my Native American heritage and ceremonies little things started happening. After a long time thinking I would never have a "good job". I applied to work for the city I live in and in all honesty thought ..... "There I applied and now I'll never hear from them". Well the next day they called and put me to work as a "Substitute Custodian". I passed all the background checks and drug tests. (Alcohol/Beer) is my thing!
The sub thing went great averaged about 28-32 hrs a week. no benefits but I knew they would come if I stayed sober. Well about a month ago I earned "Permanent Part time" status.... meaning I get 25 hrs for sure. And I am also considered a "internal employee" now with some benefits starting to happen.
I guess I just want to say that for me I guess I surrendered finally.... stayed sober, prayed and probably most importantly prayed for others and only prayed for the Creator to help me stay sober. The job is going well..... frankly I am well liked by most people who meet me when I'm sober, LOL. And I am hopeful that I will be full time soon with some great benefits and pay!
I can get and stay sober for relatively long stretches. Since I came here in 2013 I have had 7 months, 5 months 10 days and plenty of numbers lower then that. But when I start drinking it quickly goes bad, real bad.
I had hospital stays, two times in treatment.
This thing is cunning baffling powerful.... I sit here thinking of ways to start drinking..... safely. Only the Creator knows how I am sober today. I received a large divorce settlement which was a 401k which I can do whatever I want with. Fortunately I put most of it back into a retirement fund. But I have large sum in savings and I am sitting here thinking that if I don't get full time soon I am quitting and moving back to that city 3 hrs away where I cultivated that alcoholism..... I figure I have enough money to rent a little place and drink how I want for this summer..... so yeah this thing is crazy~!!! Thanks everyone, just goes to show you this thing is a ************!!