Thank you Hechosedrugs for your reply.
I think it is too little self esteem, Before I met him I hated everything about myself. I'm overweight and had never had a relationship so I felt ugly and unwanted. When he came into my life he was the first person to make me feel like I was worth something. I am not ok with losing everything. I just need to prove to myself that he may be the one who brought all that out of me but I can still be that person if he is not around. I will check out all the programs you have suggested.