Dear Chuck
I know several AAers who believe that codependency is at the root of all other addictions. This has definitely been true in my case.
I have 4 years sober this month from alcohol. I was one of the rare ones who was sick of it and ready to quit. I have never had the compulsion to go back to it. I do not attend AA and believe that recovery from my codependency is my primary focus.
I believe in miracles and will pray that your wife get sick of alcohol too and that your marriage be healed.