Originally Posted by
Clover71 
Sorry. I just thought of another thing I want to add. It's not neant to sway one way or another or to scare you. More like a heads up in case you do decide to leave and you encounter this
I have a close friend who told me it would be cruel for me to not stay with my AH should he seek treatment. In her words he would stop drinking and everything would be fine except you would have to avoid places with alcohol and friends who like to drink. (Ironically he mostly drinks at home and doesn't really have friends, nor do I here) She obviously knows nothing about recovery and what it is actually like for either party. I was pissed when she said it, and now I don't discuss it with her anymore.
Clover, this may be telling, but there is NO ONE in either of our lives who would blame me for leaving AH. They ALL think I’m off the deep end for staying three years, which says something about how poorly my spouse treats people, not just me. Yikes, right? He’s really ticked a lot of people off and has few cheerleaders left. He has some serious trust to rebuild among many people. Again, the more sober I get the more I see this. But thank you for the warning! I think I’m my own harshest critic in this regard and appreciate that someone pointed out leaving doesn’t have to have anything to do with AH’s state of sobriety. Leaving him and his state of sobriety are separate things.