I had to accept that my drinking was killing me.
The natural result of accepting that is taking drinking off the table as a viable option for dealing with life - no matter how I'm feeling, what someone did to me or how scared or angry I am.
No matter how valid the reason might seem, I cannot drink alcohol over it. Ever.
You can't be a little bit in recovery IMO.
It started as the hardest thing I'd ever done...but it got easier with time and practice.
I worked hard developing alternatives and strategies to help me deal with the things I used to drin k over..
I'm not in AA but I think that dismissing the drink as a viable option correlates to step one.
It's the fundamental step.
D