If he is only a boyfriend, cut him loose. If I knew what I know now I would never have married my husband. I was dating a solid boring guy when I met my husband, but we al anons want the excitement, etc and I opted for the 'excitement.' If I could have known then what I know now I would have run for the hills. You have the chance to run for the hills. Do not become enmeshed with your exb, go and live your life far far away!