The god stuff bothered me quite a bit when I first started AA. It took me quite some time to get over it. I had to realize that I had a very fixed and inflexible ideas of what "god" was. In effect I had a prejudice that prevented me from being objective about the subject.
TomSteve quotes the book which says "Do I now believe,
or am I even willing to believe, that there is a Power greater than myself?" The part I wish to emphasize in bold. If you are not
willing to believe then I would argue that you have a prejudice (just like I did). Its an example of what's called 'confirmaton bias'.
Until you fully explore the possibility that there
could be a 'higher' power I suggest you use
Group
O f
D runks.
If you are scientifically inclined you might enjoy this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-d4ugppcRUE
I wish I'd have found it much sooner. It's about an hour long.
All the best to you.