Originally Posted by
888 pancakes 
Thanks for this. Really hits home.
Ironically she just made contact for the first time in a couple of weeks. Sent an email saying she "I really miss you."
I really miss her too but writing that feels hella dangerous. That said, I feel like I have to respond with something...
Yeah man I've been there, those crazy dysfunctional relationships can be amazing when things are going good / after "making up" / etc. It's almost like that's another type of addiction that comes with being dysfunctional. But just like having a drink, you can play out in your head what happens if you respond / start talking again. She'll come over to your place, you'll have an awesome night, and then within a week it's back to square one. Nothing has changed except it's been a while since either of you have had that "emotional" drink.