Hi Wildflower
I feel exactly the same way as you. I visit this site all the time but havent posted for a while now due to feeling not worthy of other peoples time and burning embarrassment at not being able to sustain sobriety. I had a bit of a negative comment a while back that sent me running for the hills but after reading your post and all the completely supportive replies I am going to jump back in.
I want 2018 to be my year to stand up and be counted. I want it so badly.
So please stay here. If I can give it another go, can't you too ?? My new motto is going to be.....Never give up on giving up.
C