The night before last I went to bed, I woke up at about 5 am and vomited terribly all over my bed, I put the covers in the washing machine and turned it on, then my electric ran out. I got into a sleeping bag and woke up at 7 pm. I felt terrible, I had missed my methadone pick up, but I knew that night at 12 am I would have my social security benefits go into my account, I shuffled around the streets desperately trying to kill time till 12 am, thinking only of heroin and crack cocaine, I felt like I needed it. It finally went in, around 250 pounds of tax payers money and I spent it all on crack and heroin. Now it's the next day and I don't have a penny, no electricity no food, it's like I have no self control. My life is one big mess. I don't know what to do, I was looking into an organisation called Christians Against Poverty and they offer a service where they can look after your money and make sure you get what you need, I'm waiting for their help line to open. Sorry I let all you guys down again, I bet you feel like you wasted your breath and I'm Reay sorry.