Originally Posted by
Soulful 
I know I have my own share in this mess. I am certain reacting to him a lot, belittling him and getting violent towards him at times doesn't make me a saint. I just want to be a better person and I want to be free of this mess.
Soulful, this resonated with me to the marrow of my bones. I just want to be a better person and free of this mess.
I told my AH just last night when asked about my commitment to him , "I don't want this for the rest of my life. I have a higher bar set for myself. When did YOU let your bar get set so low?" We didn't dream about this effed up nonsense when we were little girls. So.....we've made some mistakes ourselves. We do have the power to change, and it sounds like the last time you did, you did quite well.
My AH says this is supposed to be a GREAT WEEK!
In the meantime, I've got to buckle down and finish my school and get some financial issues in order. I say just forgive yourself for letting him back in your life (you did have a child with him and I so get wanting your "happily ever after") and forge ahead. Keep being the best mom you can be for your son! ((hugs))