I was very depressed and suicidal as well early on, you just have 6 weeks in, these feelings lifted for me about 3 months in. In the meantime I slept alot, ate well and just took it day by day. I also prayed for guidance in my life. Every day I just said help me do the best I can today, guide me in the path I should take. I wrote a gratitude list which helped, as for the hole, self-love will fill it. For me that was self-pride in my sobriety. Finally, finally quitting and throwing that monkey off my back. My self pride is high, my self love too. Hang in there short-stop.