Goodguy.....You have been hurt very deeply....wounded into your core.....after all, this is one of the most painful experiences that we can go through, in life.
This is going to take you quite a while to work your way through this....and, you will go through a whole spectrum of emotions, as that is happening....
I honestly, don't see anything that I would consider outside of the norm for the situation.....Feelings/emotions are what they are...they are all legitimate (managing them is another subject)....they belong to us and cannot be judged...
After one has bonded with their love object, and the bonds have been threatened or broken....one yearns intensely to connect to the love object...so much so that it can override almost anything else, at times.....
I have been there...so I know this to be true....and, I have walked beside many others who were going through this.....
My heart goes out to you....as a compassionate human being....
Around here, the advice is often given to...."take what you need and leave the rest".....
Lol...I must confess, that everytime I read one of your posts, this song pops into my head!!! I guess it must be because I think it captures where I think you must be, emotionally, at this time......?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AVUOtH8feoI