good on ya for recognizing it,SS!
i find it funny how if im by myself and trying to reflect on early recovery, i cant remember crap, cept i went to meetings.
then read a post like yours and get a flashback to then and remember.
i dont know about you, but all the thoughts/feelings/emotions just about drove me ******* crazy- er.
it was quite refreshing to hear frommy sponsor and at meetings its quite common. personally, i drank for about 23 years. my melon was a little mushy and slow- the thinkin,feelin, and emotional parts of my melon were a wee bit polluted.
after stopping drinking, them thinkin, feelin, and emotionin parts of my melon were firin back up- something that hadnt really been done in a loooooong time.well, actually them parts of my melon were rather stuck back in time-back when before i ever started drinkin.
holy smokes were they goin crazy! i had one jillion, three hundred quadrillion and infinity thoughts and questions- questioning and thinking about EVERYTHING .
what was true about me and life and what wasnt???
welp, my sponsor and others in the program couldnt answer that with much more than sayin they experienced it and with time and workin the steps, it all calmed down and made sense.
NOT what i wanted to hear!! i wanted fixin and i wanted fixin NOW!
patience wasnt a strong point of mine.
but they were right.trudging was NOT what i wanted to do, but necessary.
one of my favorite parts of the BB:
Our book is meant to be suggestive only.
We realize we know only a little. God will constantly disclose more to you and to us. Ask Him in your morning meditation what you can do each day for the man who is still sick.
The answers will come, if your own house is in order. But obviously you cannot transmit something you haven't got. See to it that your relationship with Him is right, and great events will come to pass for you and countless others. This is the Great Fact for us.
Abandon yourself to God as you understand God. Admit your faults to Him and to your fellows. Clear away the wreckage of your past. Give freely of what you find and join us. We shall be with you in the Fellowship of the Spirit, and you will surely meet some of us as you trudge the Road of Happy Destiny.
again, good on ya for recognizing it!
