Originally Posted by
Pebbles666 
Hi Lovely....
without going into details... I really do know how you feel.
You are totally allowed to feel angry... its how you channel that anger that counts. . Anger in a negative way is soul destroying ...it like a cancer inside of us that can lead to drinking... violence.. drugs.. blah blah... But anger can also be a huge motivator.. it can make you determined to have a better life... a better you... a kind you , so you don't sink to the level of those that have hurt you.
The most important thing is not to let the anger provoke you to drinking. It would be pouring petrol on a fire. Short term... be kind to yourself today.. spoil yourself.. music.. meditation... exercise...books.. films.. anything to get back on balance. ...
Longer term... have you spoken to anyone about the horrific things..? Can you get counselling .. or a kind of therapy that you,d be happy with ?
Take baby steps today... don't let the feelings release the AV from its cage. It would love that.
Sending you a million hugs... You got this. xxxxx
Thanks for the kind words and wisdom, Pebbles. I've talked a bit about my past with therapists, counsellors, etc. Not sure if it's something I need to go more in-depth into, but that dream sure came out of nowhere.
I struggle hard with resentments. These days I've been allowing myself to feel angry for an allotted amount of time. And then I tend to kinda come out of it on my own.
All I know is that I won't drink over it. No matter what. The last thing I need is to harbour further resentments against MYSELF.