Oh Angel!
listen to what midas and all your friends here are staying...next time you might not make it back...each binge is getting worse....your addiction WILL kill you if you let it. Use your support structures, DO (don't try!) what you need to, you ARE too special to just end up another statistic...cocaine WILL kill you if you just allow it.
Please try stepping up NA or something that can help you to beat this! I't's bloody hard, but we CAN do it - and YOU can do it and YOU deserve it!
Love
Cath