Alan60

Hi
I'm Alan husband of a wife who drinks very very heavily on average every 4-6 weeks . When she drinks its 95% of time strong cheap cider 7.5% and I would say about 5 litres a day ( her tolerance is high ) .

I have successfully brought her down using alcohol with supplying less and less and watering down 7.5 to 5 % its cheaper that way.

My question is this . My wife insists on nipping out ( I know what this means mostly ) But sometimes when she does this while withdrawing I'm unsure if she has had an extra drink or not . The problem I have is during withdrawal she often appears drunk , when the brain and body start to adjust back to normal she can appear completely out of it . Is a red face due to , to much alcohol or withdrawing a little to quick .

When she is going to nip out she is dangerously unstable how she goes down the street and gets back again and looking as worse for wear as she does I do not know . THe stress its putting on me is intolerable.

I do try stopping her from going out but , but I would have to use force to do so and you cant keep somone prisoner until they get asober enough to see the light.

Just today if I had not been at the back of her holding her jeans through her belt ring she would have fell backwards on the stairs , I just don't know what to do in the u.k about this . There is no help and I don't have £5000-£8000 to put her in rehab even once.

It just seems like I'm an hopeless passenger waiting and watching till she injures herself to the point of no return and theres not a damn thing I can do .

She has tried the local free service, but either there no good or she isn't telling or doing what they want her to do as she doesn't get free rehab they say is on offer .

I'm at my wits end here anyone in u.k in same boat ???.

My real question is how can you tell for sure if the person is drunk or going thru heavy withdrawal. She did once have a fit around 2 years ago when she lied to me originally on how much she had been having so it ended in her withdrawing to fast. She has been drinking on and off for around 12 years.

There is hope her eyes are white , she eats mostly, she does have a swollen stomach ( beer drinkers belly ) I know not polite to a woman but facts are facts. She gets the thiamine and Vit B tablets everyday. I make sure she gets water down her. And around a year ago her liver was back to practically normal and over the past 8 weeks she hasn't been drinking heavily . But last 3 to 5 days she really gone for it.

She has lost her jobs, her car, and she doesn't get money from me . Now I hear you ask how she get the drink . She sells things from her hobby when sober and if that's not doing anything she actually asks people for money and they give it her . Tried getting police involved and they say its freely given nothing they can do .