To the OP. Thanks for putting this question out there. Being a chronic relapser myself, I often wondered the same thing. Often, it kept me from posting, because I felt like such a loser, failure. Every time I had to go back to day one.
But, I reckon many folks here didnt just get it right away. This site is such a blessing, and refuge to many. Sure its embarrassing to keep slipping back into addiction, but Im sure most people on here get it. Im so thankful to have a place to come to for support, and advice. No matter how often need be.
SR family.