Aww magnum, I relate to your post so much (as lots of others no doubt do also).
I've lost good friends because of my drinking. I also retained better friends who put themselves on my shoes and tried to understand my harsh journey.
And I have also gained some awesome friends since having 9 months of sobriety.
Life evolves, friendships come and go for various reasons.
Being an alcoholic I am soft on the approach that you lost friends because you were unwell, mentally and physically. They couldn't put themselves in your shoes and the friendship dissipates. It's ok though.
You will meet more friends during your life. Just be kind to yourself. You're not a bad person, you are ill. And this illness is a d$ck! Positive self talk is helping me. Takes work and a bit of time but you keep talking positive to your inner self and you start believing it. It's freaky
xx
Edit: I should also write that I have slipped up. A couple of times. And currently slipping so I know how hard this fight is, but I keep fighting. Don't ever quit trying to quit hunny!