Afternoon all, to quote a friend of mine, the skies are blue and the birds are singing and life is just fine.
The past few days have caused me to look hard and be hyper aware of what gives fuel to my AV, my addiction, my unconscious desire to separate myself from reality. What can I do, when I feel that "adrenaline" need of wine within me.
Okay, I drink when I am happy, feeling good. I am socially insecure, so will also drink prior to any get togethers. Well okay,, I will drink on any occasion.
What do I think/feel, stops the wine train in its tracks? I have tried writing in a journal, which seems to help albiet after the fact. Last night as I was getting ready to leave work, my AV and addiction was screaming, I knew I had to find focus, get the bad energy in check or I would be stopping at the store, someone here on our thread made me think of what brought peace to our lives, and I thought, what would bring me peace? For some reason I turned to You Tube and brought up an old favorite artist of mine, John Denver, I closed my eyes and relaxed, listened to the words, let them take me back to a different time, I than drove home without a thought of wine. Today (my saturday) slept well, feeling awesome, turned on the tunes,,,,,, I heard that darn AV creeping around, switched music to a less energetic genre and felt more in touch with my strength.
I am not saying I am listening to or acting in a dark way, but right now I think I need to keep my energies in a more streamlined, middle of the emotional extreme road. Does this make sense??
So today I downloaded a bunch of John's music, changed the stations in the car, and checked in here a bunch.
Please forgive me for this long rambling post but I am in a good place right now and wanted to share what I discovered about myself.
Love you guys
Badge