I feel pathetic...I know I should know better.
I'm sorry if I'm so repetitive on these forums. My addict ex who was addicted to cocaine left me about 4 months ago for no real reason. I know the reason was his addiction, but he never bothered to acknowledge anything.
The other night he posted a picture with another woman he spent 2 weeks with in San Fran who I know is a party girl as well. I've blocked him since I saw it...I know it wasn't good for me. I just didn't expect him to move on so fast without even acknowledging or showing ANY remorse for me.
I can't sleep, eat, or even think straight. I started questioning whether he is really addicted to cocaine or if he is clean. It's just bizarre. We were in a very public 4+ year relationship and now you are posting with someone else?
I am so devastated. I know I should move on, but HOW do you move on with no remorse? I have not said anything to him since the break up - never begged for him back, no phone calls, texts, nothing. I tried to keep my head because if I go there...oh my god...I just can't let him take anymore from me.
Anyone know any cocaine addicts who do this? They just keep going and wreak havoc and just never feel bad? He kept picking fights with me before the break up. It was like I couldn't say or do anything right without him blaming me and I wonder does he know that he left me to do cocaine? And what does this girl have to offer that I don't?
Do they move on? How does an addicts mind work? Any responses will help. I am desperate and have spent a lot of time on here...I just feel like when will this pain end?
It isn't fair and I KNOW life isn't fair, but when cocaine use is heavy, WTF happens next? When do you hit rock bottom? His parents pay all of his bills and are in denial he has an issue.
Is it worth me telling him I know everything and that I hope one day I get the apology I deserve? He really ****** me over. Yes, I am grateful we aren't married. Yes, I am grateful we didn't have kids. But it just feel so wrong to get off scott-free.
This pain and overthinking is unbearable.