Part of the reason I drink is because I am not very comfortable in social situations. That is one of the problems i have with the meetings. It would be hard for me to start asking around for a ride. I rarely ask anyone for anything. I have ben told thatI appear to feel confident, but the truth of th e matter is I am scaird s*** around people, unlessI am buzzed. I go to meetings, but I have yet said one word besides beth, I am an addict. I hear people go on and on and I wonder how they can trust strangers with what I think are some pretty intimate, or personal thoughts and feelings. I could never put myself out there like that, I am way to raw. It is horrible to say, but besides one person, who I still can't figure out why I let them through the wall, I don't trust anyone, and I think I have become afraid of people. I used to be in various bands, and now I can't even go to an audition sober. I think I am rambling sorry.