"God has done for me what I could not do for myself."
Here's how I see it in my little mind: God is a very small word for an indescribable concept. Aum is just as small of a word, but comes closer to describing my HP (in my mind, anyhow). I've always been drawn to the story of Moses at the burning bush when God says his name is "I am that I am." Circular, infinite, a riddle that can't be solved, indescribable. As I currently understand it, Aum is the sound that best describes the meaning of the concept of God, everything that is, everything that links us together with each other and all that is.
So God, or the Aum, has always been doing for me what I cannot do for myself. That doing has been external as well as internal - through me. Really, all I need to do is pay attention and do/think/say the best I know how by heeding that which I instinctively know to be right and true. Obliterating that rightness with my substance of choice is wrong because it masks and suppresses who I am, a part of the Aum.
Of course, I'm not satisfied with all of those words because they don't do justice to the feeling or knowledge or whatever it is. Popeye said it much more succinctly and as clearly as anyone (or cartoon
) can: "I yam what I yam," a reflection and agent of the Aum.
Physically: Rested!
Mentally: Gosh, I dunno. I think I just confused myself.
Spiritually: Present
p.s. Today is Day 30. The Addictive Voice has taken to whining. I'm noticing and just sort of sitting with It for now.