LonelyShadow

Hi everyone, just wanted to discuss AVRT a little due to a recent experience. Bare in mind I use AVRT and I am firmly committed to sticking to it as my 'Recovery' method. But if the AV shows up in my post here it's because I'm a little fuzzy headed still, feel free to point It out if I miss It. I will keep this as brief as possible.

I was recently hospitalised due to the fact I drank heavily for 5 days after a year without drinking anything at all.

The A&E department were very good but I could see they were fed up with having to deal with yet another drunk. I could feel my AV saying "They should be more supportive" while my rational self was overwhelmed with guilt and shame for wasting their time and resources. I knew I could trust the guilt and shame, after all, I had done something very wrong.

They brought the mental health team in and I was interviewed by a psychiatrist (here is where I need some advice) The psychiatrist was telling me that I drank because of my anxiety and depression, using it as a self-medication. It was very tempting to believe her, but I know enough from using AVRT that this simply isn't true. The only reason anyone drinks is to feel the buzz.

Since then I have been referred to mental health teams and every professional I speak to seems adamant that I am suffering from 'Depression' and I have gone along with it so far. I feel like a total fraud because I know the truth, I drank to get drunk. I tried to explain AVRT to the psychiatrist and my GP but they'd never heard of it. They are certain that the 'underlying problem' is anxiety and depression, my family are certain of this too.

I'm suppose to be contacting an addiction counsellor but I looked through the leaflet and it is full of "one to one support" and "group support", I just know for a fact that this is going to be a total waste of their time and mine, but I don't want the family to think I'm not 'trying'

I have suffered from anxiety in the past and I may take up the offer of CBT counselling, but I'm going to let them know that I consider the anxiety totally separate to alcohol. I know I don't suffer from depression because it clears up immediately the moment I'm sober.

Thank you for taking the time to read my post.
I just needed to talk on AVRT terms with people who know about it, as everyone I speak to is deep in recovery program mentality (Not bashing them as I know I'm the one who is well in the wrong.)

Any advice appreciated.
Thanks.