Originally Posted by tomsteve

very understanding. something you might want to do- something i had to do- was put myself in her shoes( in my case, my own families shoes).
shortly after deciding i wanted to get sober and started AA, i visited my sister. when i mentioned what i was doing, my brother in laws response was,"yeah,right" and he got up and left.
my sister just rolled her eyes.
after talking to my sponsor about it, everything he said made sense- they had HEARD the story before, but they didnt SEE it- they didnt SEE me get active in recovery. they didnt see me make any changes in my life. why should they think i was serious and give me a pat of the back and "good job" and all that?
i had to show with actions. actions over T.I.M.E.=
Things I Must Earn. i had to earn their support and belief i was serious.
it was also useless for me to turn to my family- ones who had no experience with recovery- for support. the support i needed to recover- people who had been in my shoes and knew solutions- i found in AA.

a few years after getting sober, my niece bought a new-to-her house. it needed the wood floors refinished, so she called uncle tom to see if id come and do it. sure!!!
4 days later found my family in her backyard having a barbque.
laughin and having a good time. for some reason, stories of my drinking came up- the insane antics.
we were all laughin about em. i was even tellin some they didnt know about.
then my neice asked,"uncle tom, how long have you been sober now?"
"its been about 6 years now."
'im really really glad you got sober and i have my uncle back."