Bittersweetlove

I was in a relationship ( for a year) with a man that is an alcholic. It was my first experience and I handled in naively, because I loved him deeply. We broke up 5 months ago, his drinking had reached a troubling level and he was isolating us from his family. It was a heartbreaking breakup that truly left me stunned and questioning my ability to discern who should be in my life.

I moved to another city just to avoid the push and pull of this relationship. I thought by now I would be over it. I'm not at all. He called me at 2:30 am on Monday and even though I didn't answer it has thrown me for a loop. I miss him and love him yet know I can't be with him. I have a hard time dating now because I have my boundaries so high I would rather not let anyone in. Even great guys I seem to not be able to go on more than two dates before I stop seeing them.

Sadly, my ex is angry with me for reason I'm not sure of except that I have moved away. I think it's hard to handle the pernamence of that type of moving on and anger might be easier for him to deal with vs. loss. Either way, I wish he didn't hate me. It's hard to think of someone I still care for loathing me.

I guess my question is does this get better? If this man tries to come back in my life how have you handled a similar situation? Mostly, how do you learn to trust again? How do you stop worrying about them coming back and whether or not you will be strong enough to stand you ground? I feel weak and worry my love for him will overshadow what is right for me if he keeps coming back.