Originally Posted by
pocketbook 
- He's always had a drink before our dates, I joke he needs beer goggles and he'll 'joke' he still gets nervous around me
All of those things you cited raised a red flag, but this one stood out for me, because I never, ever understood (before I learned about alcoholism) about the whole pre-gaming thing. My AH was two hours late for our first date because he was shoring up his nerves at a bar before he came to pick me up.
(I've always wondered WHY I would go out on a first date with someone who was two hours late?? Why didn't I lock the door and tell him to take a hike?--to the honest, the reason is, I thought we were a perfect match.)
Those signals you provided for us are very clear indicators that your gut is telling you something that you should listen to.