Be my real shelf. Trust my gut instinct and don't over ride it. If something feels uncomfortable, move away quietly and smoothly. Love my introvert self. Loud addicts are the exact opposite of what my heart and soul like and enjoy. Don't change myself for anyone. Nowhere, no how.
Be kind to myself. Putting myself in situations that literally make me feel ill isn't being kind to myself.
Don't enable or humour people. This ALWAYS ends in disaster for me. Always gives me pain and usually costs me money.
Pause, pause and pause again. My unhealthy reaction is to rush in and fix/rescue. Don't. Is arrogant of me besides giving me heartache. Getting me into awful positions which then give my self esteem a bashing as I try to dig myself out.
"No" is a full sentence as is the glorious Al-anon "oh".
If someone is hitting my buttons to get me to do something or give them something, be aware enough to feel it, then make my exit. Don't be around people like that. They will move on and find another supplier!!
Equally if I would like something, I need to plainly politely state it. Not hint or manipulate.
Don't bother to try and manage hubby's alcohol quit. Pay attention to my own quits.
My quit list is long but manageable with care.
Some thing that I hear in Al-anon shares that really makes sense to me is that drinkers do insane things when drink is in their body, however I can easily do those same insane things with no drink in my body! Hence pause, pause and pause again. 😀