I remember feeling like everyone was out to get me and that every comment made had malicious undertones. It was a painful place to be, and I wished that I have started working on my recovery much earlier so that I hadn't stayed there so long.
I can imagine how you are feeling, but it's more a reflection of where you are and your perspective and that rawness of sobriety without recovery (esp if you have those codependent tendencies to rattle you as well) than the folk on here. Honestly, the people on here really are some of the most supportive I have found.
Just in case you are interested in why people talk to others in recovery rather than their friends and family who live them... well, the thing is, its pretty hard to understand alcoholic thinking even when you ARE an alcoholic. Our beloved Normies really don't understand it. And why should they? We support each other. One day I might be doing the supporting. Another day something will come up and I get to be on the receiving end. There is nothing sinister about support networks in recovery.
People on here are not bullies. On the rare occasion that there are issues and things get heated (maybe as the result of someone posting after drinking) the moderators are onto it lickity split.
You seem to be at a good rolling simmer with all your resentments against people who do not live up to your expectations, so no wonder it's not taking a huge amount to cause you to emotionally boil over. The thing is, we cannot change other people. We can only change ourselves and how we deal with things. I've had to learn this the hard way, especially with regards to some family members. When I became willing to adjust my expectations then I was in less pain from their actions. So, they did the same thing as before but I wasn't half as affected by it. It really does work, but finding that willingness while the resentment is hot in our blood is difficult.
I hope you will reread the comments people made in response to your posts one day when you are feeling a little better so you can see that really, no one was being bullying or manipulative.
I wish you all the best for your sobriety and recovery. Prayers and blessings for a joyous and free future. BB