Nnm,
Welcome, and you are asking some great questions. I feel in the tone of your "voice" you are getting very over whelmed by reading the comments above. I to highly recommend alanon. In alanon they recommend not doing anything for 6 months. Sit back, try and take some control and figure out what you want in life. When you learn about alanons philosophy, you change, not him. By you changing, he "might" change, you never know.
I agree with lexie, he does not have a problem with his drinking, you do. So it's not his problem to fix, it's yours. So on this forum, in alanon, or with an addiction therapist you will slowly learn how to deal with your problem.
Some spouses do nothing and live with it , some learn to detach with love, some spouses seperate, some spouses divorce. You have time to work on yourself. I would start thinking about how you will support yourself and your kids. This takes time and either way if you stay or leave it will give you more confidence to do what you would need to do to support your family. None of us have walked in your shoes, and will tell you what to do. (If you were being abused, we would highly recommend you to leave, but I don't think that is the case here)
Education is power. Read and learn. It is an upward battle dealing with an addict. I suffered for 34 years with mine. Through the support of these people on this forum and alanon, I finally found the strength to divorce him. It was one of the most painful things I have ever done, but I thank God everyday that I am not living that life anymore, we coexisted for way to long. I am 2 1/2 years post divorce, my life is good, his is still a train wreck, and getting worse.
Take some breaths. Don't make any major decisions, do your homework and you will be ok. Keep asking questions and just ponder the answers. We are all here for you my friend, we all understand.