Nonotme.....yes, I would say that educating yourself about alcoholism and co-dependency would be a good solid first step to getting a handle on your situation.
I have always considered knowledge to be power.
That is part of the standard advice that is given to a newcomer, here....
Most people know very little about the nature of alcoholism...even those who were raised in it....There are a lot of myths and misinformation that is commonly held, though...lol...
Those who do know are usually those w ho have had a compelling reason to have to study about , for some reason...
You are lucky, in this respect, because you have come to a place that has the most collected information and experience that you will find anywhere....
First of all, there are thousands...yes, thousands of real life stories from those who have lived through it, on this forum....I suggest that you read through them....you will see your own experience mirrored there, thousands of times....
You can learn from these others.....
Please, please, do not miss the "stickies" on the front page of this forum....it contains so much concentrated knowledge and information.
***I suggest that you begin with the one called "Classic Reading".....I especially like the one titled "10 ways to know if your addict or alcoholic is full of crap".....
Look around the whole website...there are many other forums relating to alcoholism and drug abuse...as well as general interest groups....
You might look at the ones for the alcoholics, themselves....or the one for Adult Children of Alcoholics....
Like honeypig just said...keep an open mind about alanon.....Lots of people find that t heir preconceived ideas about it are not really accurate....
It is a froup that is exclusively for those who have or are being affected by another's drinking...it is for YOU...not the alcoholic...
Alcoholics already have their own group...lol.....