Originally Posted by
Whitewingeddove 
My son has "cut me off" apparently. I haven't spoken with him in over 2 mos. Long story short, I'm angry with him. I hold onto that. It helps. a TON! I love my son, but I love me too. I cannot believe how much lighter I feel. I'm not on that rollercoaster anymore. I'm becoming more mindful of my environment and starting to appreciate the positives in my life. I get sad, but I don't unpack and move in there.....I have thoughts about him every day, but I set them aside, as there is nothing I can do. It's bittersweet that this is what has brought me peace. I'm learning how to live my own life. You are young, and have soooooooooooooooo much more ahead of you. Just breathe, and take one day at a time. I started seeing a counselor months ago, and it's helped me immensely. Keep posting. There is a ton of support on this site. My life is not perfect, but the positive things in my life are very very good.
I've read that addicts will cut people out. Does your son do that with other people as well? I'm still at a loss for him doing this to me.
When he did this previously, we had had one of the best nights we had had in a long time. Laughing and joking around and I was helping him with his resume. Very loving and sweet all evening and all night. Then BOOM. Silence. That one had nothing to do with me asking too many questions or calling him out on things or anything between us. I was worried sick. That was when I got a hold of his family and he wouldn't take any of our calls. He quit speaking to his mother the same day as me. When a non-working addict does that and uses and disappears that makes sense to me. But he continued to go to work. It's possible he took off work for a week or so but this silence lasted for several weeks. No way he would have not gone to work that long, he would have been fired.
I had already told myself if he ever did that again, I would have to move on. I knew I couldn't live like that. He didn't even seem to care about how worried we all were.