There are many roads to the same destination. AA, SMART, SR Forum and anything that you find assists in your sobriety. I, too, had issues at your age with alcohol. I then continued to have those issues well into my thirties. It is disheartening and troubling for sure.
I do not approach my sobriety (this time around) as if I will never drink again in my life. These thoughts, to me, make a statement internally that could set me up for failure. I approach the sans alcohol life like this:
I love myself and my life enough to stop damaging myself.
I am capable and deserving of a life with stability and self respect.
I want to have energy for my life and the things I love to do.
I want to give my work, home and relationships the BEST of myself.
I know what is meant for me and what is not meant for me.
I am deserving of a clear mind, heart and spirit.
I am empowered when not in the grips of active alcoholism.
I have a choice to suffer, a choice to thrive, a choice to drink or not. I choose to abstain from alcohol.
These statements that I tell myself have been very powerful.
You can do this and it doesnt have to be a bad thing. Abstaining from alcohol can be the most positive step you can make! You can do this!