Hey guys, going to join this thread too, I seem to need to branch out more in SR as I'm getting less real time support due to the nature of my work- being stuck at home babysitting a gaggle of children past meeting times.
Congrats Babs on a year!!
Myself I am coming up on 4 months on May 1st. Longest stretch in about 4 years. Feeling much more confident and vigilant and working at not taking my sobriety for granted. I learned a lot from my relapses last year. I got longer and longer stretches as I did more work on myself. I went to a 6 week family treatment program which made a huge difference to me. I have put so much into my recovery since last September that I feel much more stubborn at keeping on the right path.
KIR, I'll explain some of what works for me. I personally, keep my journalling for gratitude and working out my feelings, I have a separate journal to get my anger and resentments out in letter form (sort of a burn journal)
The dealing with cravings to me is an inside job, meaning I have to keep it on hand, in my mind ready to go at all times. I can't always reach for a journal, say I'm on the road, dealing with kids, etc.
But what I can do, is acknowledge that the craving is there. I treat the thought as separate from me in my conscious. Sometimes I can straight out tell it no, treat it like a tantruming child, and eventually ignore it. I remind myself it's just a thought, not a factual thing I need to act on. Remind myself, I don't drink.
Sometimes, I let 'it' entertain the thought of a drink instead of fighting against it if it seems a lot stronger. I imagine in my mind from beginning the actual experience of taking the drink. I let the imagined experience happen without resisting it. Once I'm done the imaginary first drink, I push my thoughts forward (play the tape) to the feelings and consequences of that first drink. I do try to keep the experience of a 'small relapse' at the forefront for thoughts like these. How one drink led to the very quick body pains and illness and obsessive thoughts.
There are all kinds of different tools and tricks you can use to get through these thoughts, and you will have to figure out what works for you and what doesn't. The thing is, the more you try and practice, the easier it gets over time and the less frequency the urges occur.
It takes a lot of persistent repetition for it to come more naturally. My descriptions are what works for me, it's not necessarily the precise description of what works for me because it's a little different each time.
In the beginning there were situations that I white knuckled it, but they were few as there is no way I wanted to live sobriety and recovery white knuckling every urge and difficult situation. "don't think about a pink elephant, don't think about a pink elephant." What you thinking about?
Also... HALT... hungry, angry, lonely, tired/thirsty and I also think sad. Are all triggers.
Knowing your bad triggers is really good too. Being well armed knowing you are going to face a difficult situation is very helpful. This is where good support can be a real benefit.
Sometimes, I simply tell on my AV. I just say it, text it, or post on here and say "I want to drink" For me giving some kind of space outside of my head takes away the grip it has on my brain.
Remember, a relapse starts way before the first drink, but that first drink is always a choice.
If anyone is interested I can post the relapse ladder. It was very helpful to me in early recovery as I could gauge how well I was doing mentally, where I was at.
