Originally Posted by
zenchaser 
So my boyfriend outed me, he told everyone there that the reason I didn't come was that I'd quit drinking and was uncomfortable going to a bar. The very discussion I was trying to avoid he dropped on everyone without me there to explain myself. WTF? He says that everyone was very understanding. I feel betrayed, it wasn't his place to share that private information. I guess people were going to find out eventually anyways but I would have liked to tell them in my own way and in my own words. He sure showed me. That'll learn me for not doing what he wants. Jerk.
That sucks. And how you deal with him and all that is a separate topic- what I want to contribute here is that it is and unfortunate reality that we simply cannot control when, if, how etc those in our lives tell others about our alcoholism. For me, this means letting go of resentment at my mom for telling people; not her place, and she knows how I feel about it, but I have had to (repeatedly) reconcile my own lane and let hers go, so to speak. I try to remember what I know is true- she is so happy and proud (I suffered long and so did my family and many others) and others knew how sick I was, that she can't help herself.
Letting go of what I cannot control- and working not to be resentful about it- is important (critical even) for me. AA helps me do this and it's why I read certain BB pages every day, on acceptance and taking MY OWN inventory, and the like.
You deserve a good, happy sober life. Making the right choices to support that can be hard - you did a good job in this case, despite this one part of the outcome- and I have found I continue to make better and better decisions (even if they aren't explicable to others when I make them, or others do things with them I don't like) as I grow in spiritual condition and my "reflexes" are increasingly in line with myprogram.
Keep going.