Originally Posted by
icoi87 
Thanks for all the kind replies! I have been attending AA, about 2 or 3 times a week. I am reading the BB but haven't gotten a sponsor yet.. I know I need to. I have had depression in the past so I will keep an eye on it. Maybe just everything I was masking for so long floating to the surface. I don't expect to be "high" on sobriety or anything, just thought I'd feel a little better!
This is exactly me. One of the things about abruptly becoming sober is that reality sets in, and reality is often not so pleasant.
A few years back I re-enrolled in college during my first lengthy sober stint and really began to turn things around. I was very focused on the coursework, regularly worked with others, made (school) friends, and learned a lot. But I found that getting back out in the world and being around a lot of people can reveal just how lonely you really are.
I was a social butterfly as a younger guy, and actually used to have girls chase me down. But after alcoholism set in and I slowly withdrew over a 10+ year period, I re-emerged only to
face the fact that people my age had matured, started families, and established themselves in careers. I really couldn't identify with them on a personal level. My development had been stunted by alcoholism. All of the things that I used to take for granted no longer existed.
So while I'm happy that I'm not drinking, it's not uncommon to feel lost and empty at times.. even if making positive, constructive strides.