I've been where you are now. Just four short months ago. The last thing I did before going to bed was make sure there was a couple shots of JD left to allow me to function in the morning. I had quit pursuing my hobbies and started to disassociate myself from those that I cared about. I was still around these people (and they are great) but I did not feel them part of my inner circle. Alcohol had become my spouse, my best friend, and my confidant. It never let me down, it was guaranteed, if I drank enough I didn't care too much about anything. I was numbing myself to the world one shot at a time.
If you reading this and it strikes a nerve, know that you are not alone. Welcome...