Welcome to SR. I can understand your resentment, radishes, but....sadly that isn't going to help you in the long run. What is your goal? Give up the wine? Keep the wine but give up the resentment toward your spouse? sounds like you would like to be sober, but you are not ready yet.
So, how about you just focus on today. Instead of a glass of wine tonight, why not warm cider or milk or decaf tea. A lot of drinking is, at day's end, habitual. Why not change up the habit?
I would not keep in the emotions about what you feel is your husband's part in getting you back to wine. Stuffed feelings have a way of coming out sideways. Talk to a therapist or a good friend. Talk to him when you are both in a good place.
By the way, my youngest grandchild was a late in life surprise. He is truly a blessing and a joy. Best of luck to you.