Hi everyone. This is my first post.
Blankspace...I did the same thing, dry January. It wasn't too hard surprisingly, no detox symptoms really. I combined quitting with a new diet plan and exercise regimine which helped, but as the month went on (and now has ended) I'm feeling some anxiety. I quit because I was getting nothing done except drinking every night (beer, at home mostly) and it was making me feel like a piece of crap. Like I was surrendering control of my life. I had the feeling I was at a crossroads where one direction would lead off a cliff, and the other to an unknown place that might include the chance to live the life I want to live and self control. I'm very disciplined with some things, but not alcohol. 1 beer leads to 6, which leads to 12+. I like to drink the 8.5% stuff so it adds up. One of my buddies, who I'm sure is an alcoholic, stopped with me and it was kind of a mutual challenge which both of us have completed. I became aware that I was thinking and planning for Feb 1 for a scheduled binge and it started to make me very nervous. Now I don't know what to do. I was at a party the other night (first one without drinking) and some woman started giving me grief about not drinking which was a new one for me. I'm not the kind of person to have trouble telling people like that to go screw themselves, and it was interesting watching drunks through a sober lens, but I'm scared that if I drink again it will lead to the same old familiar place. My uncomfortable/comfortable place. Like a pillow with rocks in it. I'm sure the most obvious advice is "Well...don't drink if it worries you!" Makes sense but is really difficult to reconcile somehow. I guess the worst part is feeling out of control and that decisions are being made for me because of my drinking. I know it's ultimately my decision but alcohol sometimes really does feel like another voice in my head (figuratively speaking).
What are you going to do Blankspace?
By the way, it's obvious there's a lot of wisdom and experience on this forum and I appreciate it very much.