Thank u. I know what ur saying is so true. Some things I've realized lately is that I have no coping skills in life. I turn to the drink for every occasion /feeling. Happy or sad. I wonder if this is common with other alcoholics? I am a binge drinker so i usually have a semi-normal life then the Av starts and bamm its like a mac truck hit me. Absolutely no control. Also recently i have been having alot of pain the the galbladder/kidney/liver and its giving me alot of anxiety. Yet I continue to drink.