Originally Posted by
BrendaChenowyth 
Amends aren't always possible.. The problem is I feel like I'm trying too hard to turn my life around, if that makes sense.
Amends are always possible. You just need more guidance from someone who is
more familiar with the process. If, for example, if you have wronged someone and they have since passed away, what then? Well, there are always people in need and who may have suffered a similar fate to the person you harmed in the past. The amends are made to this surrogate. IN FULL.
Or perhaps to inform someone of a transgression you committed against them (about which they are ignorant) might hurt them more that any subsequent good you could hope to do after informing them. Then you do the amends as best you can without informing them.
Many people in AA have extensive experience with this process. In any event, it's wise to run a plan for amends past an impartial person
before you take action.
Hope you find your way out of this Brenda. Don't close any doors before you know for certain they cannot lead you to a solution. Amends are a powerful spiritual process.
All the best