Good input here.
The one thing I will respond to in your post is the comment about someone else jeopardizing your sobriety. You are the only one who controls that; you have done that for a year!!! I bet there are situations and challenges you have handled sober in that time, right?
I see the need for caution and perhaps....not dating yet. Or just slowing the spinning of your mind, with whatever tools you use when that happens (again, I bet you've used them in other situations in your sobriety, right?) - mine are ones I have learned from AA. I won't go into my relationship situation or why I chose to start a relationship at four plus months sober with someone with just over a month - and instead will just say that it is program based and individual recovery based, and there is complete trust. Emphasis on that last word because it appears that trust in a situation (to be as you define it, and do it sober) is perhaps a fear for you.
You control your choices- for me, that means when I make good ones (not drinking, putting myself in good situations including relationships with friends AND love, etc) I get good results.
Good luck.