Originally Posted by
Refiner 
ALIMONY must continue after FIVE years??? Omg, what the hell kind of judge would rule that way??? Hopefully you can get SOLE custody once he relapses and at least cut out the child support????
Alimony ends after five years, then it is just child support. Right now they are both rolled into a single unspecified support payment for tax purposes. But after 5 years it becomes child support which is my after tax dollars.
In our state, child support is a set percentage which is not tied to the time the kids spend at one house versus another. I could have argued for "offset support" which means the lower earning parent gets 30ish percent of the higher earner's income less 30ish percent of their own income. But because his income was basically nothing, that didn't do much good.
Maybe I would be able to reduce that in the event of sole custody but it's not a sure thing. And honestly I would be happier just paying it and knowing my kids were safe with me than threatening to take it away and have him fight for custody so he doesn't lose his meal ticket.
It's a bummer, but it's been long enough that I am more or less resigned to the reality of it. If given a choice to do it again, I would still decide to divorce and pay the monthly "tax" on my new life. The only thing that makes me a little sad is that I could not at this point choose to be a stay at home parent. Maybe someday.