Oh my goodness thank you all so much for your beautiful, encouraging words. I am shocked you actually took the time to respond to that mess.
I apologise for coming here out of the blue and carrying on like drunken trash.. ohh what alcohol has reduced me to. You are absolutely right. Everything you said. I just can't get enough sober days together to see for myself. 48 hours is all I can manage and then I'm almost dry retching I need a beer that bad. The anxiety that not being able to have a beer causes me.. just the thought of life without it scares me. What do you do after a stressful day at work? How do you socialise? It overwhelmed me.
I was drunk before I even got home from work last night. Dont even remember talking to the kids. Never put them to bed or kissed them goodnight. I passed out on the lounge.. not before managing to come here and give everyone a random speech. I dont even know what prompted me to come here. If my user name and password weren't saved into my phone I never would've made it here. I know i want help
Deep down I know i want to be free from all of this.
Thank you again so so much.. I appreciate it more than you know. I will read through your posts again carefully and look around this site and give day one tomorrow another chance.
Many thanks xx