Originally Posted by
sleepie 
Sigh... all I can think is "I got what I deserved"... for being weak. For being stupid. For not being perfect in sobriety, for being depressed, anxious... for being unable to muster even a false "positive" persona as I have had to IRL so many times. For not jumping into a perfect diet and exercise routine from the get-go...
Surely I am being punished for all of it.
I did it all wrong. Like I always have.
Up to a point, circumstances are the result of decisions we've made.
Example
Someone I know has been dealing with bladder incontinence. Pretty common but very embarrassing. She was gonna go to the doctor and tell them fix it. But instead she researched it and saw that she can do a few things to help herself.
The learns that she needs to lose weight because her belly is putting pressure on her bladder and she leaks. She's not going to go and lose weight overnight but she's gonna start going to the gym to use the treadmill and swap out liquid calories for more water. She will start seeing a difference over time and eventually the symptom should resolve, and if it doesn't she will go to the doctor.
But she's not sitting around with wet pants feeling sorry for herself because she let her weight creep up and she deserves this.
My point of telling you all this is... we actually accept too many things that we are fully capable of working on. Making one tiny proactive effort, in any area, makes a huge difference.