Greetings everyone! I miss having everyone else on here so frequently
I had a few rough days where the anxiety and scattered thoughts and inability to focus has reminded me of a few months ago when I was a wreck. I couldn't figure out what was going on with me, and then I remembered I had run out of 5-HTP a couple days ago. 5-HTP is a supplement that I use for anxiety and depression and I've had better results with it than any anti-depressant I've tried (just my
own experience ... everyone is different). So I went out and got some more today and now I feel the usual general sense of well-being again. So I was relieved about that.
I got back on track with AA. And I feel better for doing it. It has always been around this time in the past that I've dropped the Recovery ball because I've felt better and began drinking again (but every time, I swore a solemn oath that
this time would be different and I would drink like a normal, responsible person at the right times, in the right amounts, for the right reasons etc). Ya so the point is, now is not a good time to ease up on my AA efforts and working the program. I spoke to my Sponsor about it (or she spoke to me about it lol) and I just recommitted and jumped back in to what I was doing before. I didn't stop going to meetings but I slowed to two a week and I've learned that is certainly not enough for me. I can miss two days in a row at the most, but not three. I get off balance and off track. And I start hating going to meetings again. When I am loathing the thought of a meeting it means I need a meeting. Strange I know, but every single time I drag myself out the door I always come back in a much better mood and Spiritually replenished. So I am proud of myself for catching myself on a slippery slope downwards and preventing an eventual relapse.
I guess I'll be getting a 60 day Gold Chip soon!!! wooHOO.
It's off to bed for me .. I want to get up early tomorrow. G'night!